[Congressional Record (Bound Edition), Volume 145 (1999), Part 5]
[Extensions of Remarks]
[Pages 7009-7012]
[From the U.S. Government Publishing Office, www.gpo.gov]




                            EXPOSING RACISM

                                 ______
                                 

                        HON. BENNIE G. THOMPSON

                             of mississippi

                    in the house of representatives

                        Tuesday, April 20, 1999

  Mr. THOMPSON. Mr. Speaker, in my continuing efforts to document and 
expose racism in America, I submit the following articles into the 
Congressional Record.


[[Page 7010]]

    Black Parents Face Special Challenges Raising a Son To Be a Man

                          (By Le Datta Grimes)

       LEXINGTON, Ky.--Donita Harris is biracial. Her momma is 
     Chinese. Her daddy is black. She grew up in a predominantly 
     white neighborhood near Turfland Mall. Whenever she reflects 
     on her childhood area, one memory is clear: the neighborhood 
     carpool.
       Each week, the neighborhood moms took turns driving the 
     local children to school.
       One woman, however, refused to pick up Donita and her 
     brother. The woman didn't like black people, Harris said, so 
     she sped past their house.
       Harris, now 27, recalls this episode as she looks into the 
     chubby-checked, bright-eyed face of her 4-month-old son, 
     Robert Jr.
       `` . . . I just wonder what prejudice will look like 10 to 
     15 years from now.''
       Donita, a social worker, and her husband, Robert Sr., who 
     works at a lamp factory, know that their son will face 
     certain hardships simply because he is a black male.
       Their job as Robert Jr.'s parents, they said, is to raise a 
     man capable of withstanding today's stereotypes and achieving 
     success in spite of them.
       Raising black males in a society that depicts them as 
     angry, aggressive, lazy and ignorant presents a unique task 
     for black parents, said William Turner, an associate 
     professor of family studies at the University of Kentucky.
       While all parents seek to raise healthy, well-adjusted 
     children, black parents raising sons have some additional 
     tasks.
       They must teach their sons, Turner said, to navigate and 
     function in a society that sometimes views them through a 
     distorted looking glass.
       ``There are some extra things that black parents have to 
     teach their kids,'' he said. ``Facts about race and racism 
     are among them.''
       Tracey Bartleson is raising two sons, Xavier Spence, 7, and 
     Damone Thompson, 3.
       Damone's father and Bartleson are no longer together. 
     Xavier's father lives in Canada.
       When life puzzles her sons, it is Bartleson they run to. 
     She works the overnight shift, 11 p.m. to 7 a.m., so she can 
     be home for their questions during the day.
       A few months ago, as they were watching Selma, Lord, Selma, 
     a Disney movie depicting the sometimes violent anti-
     segregation marches that took place three decades ago in 
     Selma, Ala., Bartleson turned her head to see tears streaking 
     Xavier's face.
       ``Momma?'' he asked. ``Why would people do things like 
     that?'' Bartleson pulled her son into her arms and explained. 
     ``People don't know us from the inside,'' she said rocking 
     him. ``They pass judgment before they know us.''
       That's not right, she told him, but it happens. Bartleson 
     handled Xavier's questions on race in a positive, reassuring 
     manner. That's the best way, Turner said, to build self-
     confidence and self-love.
       Defensive statements like, ``You're black and people won't 
     like you for it,'' put children on a path to anger and 
     aggression.
       ``Finding a way (to discuss race) that isn't traumatic to 
     the child is very important,'' Turner said.
       Along with positive conversations about race, parents can 
     build their children's self-esteem by reading with them about 
     and acknowledging black role models.
       It is critical that parents do these things early, Turner 
     said, because around age 6, parents lose the ability to 
     control their children's environment.
       When children are 6, parents send them to school and into a 
     salad bowl of opinions and ideas tossed by a variety of 
     chefs. Not all of the seasonings are good.
       Turner said most boys enter kindergarten excited and 
     overjoyed with their new environment.
       He said research shows, however, that this excitement in 
     black males is often interpreted by teachers as problem 
     behavior or hyperactivity.
       In their white male counterparts, this same enthusiasm is 
     labeled rambunctious and outgoing.
       Like most boys, Xavier hurtled into kindergarten excited. 
     but his enthusiasm dwindled quickly, his mother said.
       Shortly after the school year began, Xavier's teachers 
     began sending notes home about his behavior. The notes said 
     he had problems keeping still and that he was disturbing 
     other children, Bartleson said.
       She said she knew her son was not a problem child. ``I know 
     my child,'' she said. She then enrolled Xavier in a new 
     school.
       The problem, she later discovered, was that Xavier finished 
     his work earlier than the other children, so he had time to 
     cut up. Xavier's new school, Ashland Elementary, challenges 
     him more, Bartleson said, leaving him less time to talk or 
     horse pay. Any additional energy Xavier has, Bartleson 
     channels into extracurricular activities such as piano 
     lessons, basketball and church.
       Tobey and Debra Gray of Wilmore, formerly of New York, were 
     married three years ago.
       Tobey brought five children to the union from a previous 
     marriage, Debra brought three. They have one child together.
       The family lived in a two-bedroom apartment in Manhattan. 
     Though the apartment was crowded, the Grays said the chaos 
     inside the home didn't bother them.
       It was the violence outside that kept them awake at night. 
     ``We were in an atmosphere where cursing was the order of the 
     day,'' Tobey Gray said. ''In New York City, there's the 
     opportunity to fall into a whole bunch of mess.''
       In addition to the violence, two of their sons, sixth-
     grader Colin and fourth-grader Trevor, were failing in 
     school.
       Many black boys lose interest in school about the fourth 
     grade. This pattern is addressed in the book ``Countering the 
     Conspiracy to Destroy Black Boys.'' by Jawanza Kunjufu.
       The phenomenon is called fourth-grade failure syndrome. 
     ``In fourth grade they begin to fail and fail horribly,'' 
     said Nate Sullivan, a social work professor at UK. ``This 
     culminates in dropping out either emotionally or physically 
     from the academic arena.''
       Sullivan said black males often detach themselves from 
     academics because they are ignored in the classroom and 
     receive little recognition for their academic achievement.
       ``The subtle cues you pick up on lead to a self-fulfilling 
     prophecy,'' said Margo Monteith, an assistant professor in 
     UK's department of psychology whose area of expertise is 
     prejudice and stereotypes.
       When black males fail to win approval in the classroom, 
     they seek it elsewhere, from their peers, on the streets or 
     on the athletic field, Sullivan said.
       Trevor and Colin chose the streets. Colin got into fights 
     and ran away often. Trevor fought and back-talked his 
     teachers. Seeing this, Tobey Gray resolved to get more 
     involved in his sons' lives. Gray had worked two jobs to 
     support his family, so he rarely saw the boys.
       ``If you don't give them attention, they will stray,'' he 
     said, ''I used to work all kinds of weekends and hours. But I 
     don't do that anymore. It's important to me that they grow up 
     well.''
       Gray arranged special getaways with each of his sons. Some 
     days it was a walk in the park with Colin. Other days he'd 
     surprise Trevor and drop by his school for lunch.
       ``My father was always busy, so I said I'm going to break 
     this cycle,'' Gray said.
       Six months ago, the Grays decided New York was no place to 
     raise their kids. Yet, they had nowhere to go.
       Debra said she prayed on it and came up with Kentucky. 
     Tobey wasn't sold on the idea.
       ``You sure God said Kentucky?'' he asked. Debra was sure 
     and the family--Tobey and Debra and five of their children--
     took an 18-hour bus ride to Kentucky. Tobey is a custodian at 
     Asbury College, and Debra is a substitute teacher. Both want 
     to attend Asbury Theological Seminary someday.
       Colin, now 14; Loren, 12; Trevor, 11; Tyler, 4; and 
     Timothy, 17 months, came with them. Tobey and Debra Gray's 
     grown children stayed behind in New York.
       Since the family's arrival, Loren said, she has seen a 
     difference in her brothers.
       ``I think they've matured a lot,'' she said, ``I think now 
     they can be a lot more of themselves because in New York they 
     were trying to be like other people, and down here they can 
     just express themselves.''
       The Grays wake up at 5 each morning. After greeting one 
     another with a kiss, they gather in Debra and Tobey's 
     bedroom. There, the family prays for guidance. Their prayer 
     time also doubles as a family circle during which each family 
     member discusses plans for the day.
       In the home of Barbara Commodore-Connor, a similar family 
     circle takes place around the dinner table. Whenever a family 
     decision is to be made, Barbara gathers her three sons--
     Caleb, 10; Joshua, 14, and Maureece, 21--for a family 
     meeting.
       At a recent meeting, the issue was Barbara's possible 
     engagement. ``What do you think about Momma marrying Mr. 
     Steve,'' she asked.
       The boys then took turns answering. This type of structure 
     and family cohesiveness is essential during the teen years 
     when black males are struggling to carve out their 
     identifies, Turner said.
       ``I understand parents have stresses that take away quality 
     time, (but) there needs to be family time,'' he said.
       As black males mature into their teens, stereotypes about 
     them become more pronounced. Media depictions of black teens 
     dead or on their way to prison send bleak messages to black 
     males about their futures, Turner said.
       During the teen years, black males become painfully aware 
     of how others view them: If their pants sag, they are thugs. 
     If they walk in groups, they are a gang. And, if they drive a 
     nice car, they are drug dealers.
       Accepting the reality of being stereotyped is not easy, 
     Turner said. But it is never an excuse to give in to the 
     stereotypes and fail. ``They just have to be aware that there 
     will be times when they will be excluded because of race and 
     they will be misjudged,'' he said.
       The teen years brought strife to Commodore-Connor's home. 
     When Maureece reached 15 or so, he and his mother began to 
     butt heads: She wanted him in at a certain time; Maureece 
     wanted to stay out late.
       She wanted him to go to church; he didn't want to go every 
     Sunday. The central problem, Commodore-Connor later realized, 
     was

[[Page 7011]]

     one of freedom. Maureece wanted it, but she wasn't willing to 
     give it.
       ``Momma,'' Maureece would tell her, ``I got my own mind.'' 
     His mother said she wasn't ready to hear that, so she became 
     stricter.
       And Maureece rebelled more. Finally, Commodore-Connor, a 
     resource specialist in the office of civil rights for Fayette 
     County Schools, said she turned to her big sister Peggy and 
     brother-in-law Ike.
       ``I felt like I was losing him,'' she said. ``We were 
     having confrontations, and I began to question myself.''
       Maureece's Uncle Ike played a big role in helping him 
     navigate the teen years. He gave Maureece advice, spent time 
     with him and helped him communicate with his mother better.
       Male role modeling is essential to young black males, 
     Turner said. It can come from church, school, extended family 
     or big brother programs, but the ideal source is a committed 
     father.
       ``In situations where there is a father engaged, talks come 
     about naturally and the child internalizes it,'' Turner said.
       Tobey Gray is teaching his children to love. Whenever the 
     Gray children walk into a room, they are to greet one another 
     with, ``I love you.'' They also must kiss one another good 
     morning and good night.
       Gray teaches by example. Wheverver the mood strikes, he 
     smooches his boys on the jaw or the forehead. Colin brought a 
     friend home from school once, and Gray kissed him, too.
       ``There aren't many men being men today,'' Gray said. 
     ``Women are taking the lead in everything. But, if you want 
     to lead, you got to lead by example.''
       In the seven decades since Langston Hughes wrote the poem 
     ``Mother to Son,'' the stairwell to black manhood has 
     remained a steep climb.
       Still, that is not a reason to quit scaling the stairs, 
     Turner said.
       It is OK to get angry, he said, but it is never OK to quit 
     climbing.
       Whether a child leaps the stairs two at time or gives up 
     midway depends on how the child was equipped by his parents.
       ``Black males are successful when they see a barrier but 
     say `I`m not going to let this stop me.` ''
       South Florida's racial, ethnic and cultural landscape 
     transformed--Juliet Masters can see it in their eyes.
       That inquisitive look that asks ``What are you?'' The 
     spoken question comes a moment later.
       ``Wow, I hate being asked that because I don't know what to 
     say,'' said Masters, a 24-year-old special events coordinator 
     who lives in South Miami. ``My first answer is human. Then I 
     say I'm mixed and I tell them that my mother is from England, 
     my father is from Jamaica and I was born in New York. And I 
     ask them what they think.''
       In a country that for much of its history has been 
     preoccupied with race, and for generations largely has 
     considered racial and ethnic identity in black and white 
     terms, how to deal with people of mixed heritage is becoming 
     an ever-intriguing question. Because of the nation's changing 
     demographics, it is also one that will help shape the 
     nation's debate on race well into the next century.
       The debate is important, philosophically and economically, 
     because how the country views race will shape aspects of life 
     and determine how resources are allocated. Data collected on 
     race will decide such issues as how federal and state 
     governments spend money, where political boundaries begin and 
     end as well as what will be the content of entertainment and 
     marketing campaigns.
       The issue is particularly relevant in South Florida, where 
     huge waves of immigrants have transformed the racial, ethnic 
     and cultural landscape in the last three decades.
       Today's children are growing up in a country where many of 
     recent immigrants and their offspring do not share the United 
     States' historical notions on race.
       Along with the children of mixed marriages, they will be 
     less disposed to accept the premise that people are either 
     black or white.
       There are now millions of Americans who claim more than one 
     heritage or whose cultural and ancestral roots lead them to 
     reject the American racial dichotomy, said Roderick Harrison, 
     a demographer for the Joint Center for Political and Economic 
     Studies, a Washington think-tank.
       Harrison said his research has revealed an unprecedented 
     change in attitudes about race, especially in metropolitan 
     areas of California, New York, Texas, Illinois, New Jersey 
     and Florida--states that have substantial black, white and 
     Hispanic populations.
       Attitudes are changing, he said, because a nation that 
     numerically and conceptually has been divided is becoming 
     more multiracial and multiethnic.
       ``When people look at a white, black, Hispanic or Asian 
     person 40 years from now I doubt racial or ethnic identity is 
     going to mean the same thing as it means to us,'' Harrison 
     said. ``We won't want complete assimilation but the ability 
     to retain some of our cultures.''
       For many people in South Florida, a pluralistic world 
     exists now. Hispanics, for example, generally do not define 
     themselves in terms of race--although they're aware that 
     American culture heavily relies upon it.
       ``I know it sounds corny, but hopefully, we will reach a 
     day when we talk about each other's culture rather than the 
     color of our skin,'' said Washington Collado, a native of the 
     Dominican Republic who like many people from the Caribbean 
     has a mixed ancestry.
       ``I never am put in a position where I have to define 
     myself by color,'' said Collado, 36, of Coconut Creek. 
     ``That's a question I don't even know how to answer.''
       Collado and his wife, Carmen, want their three sons, Mario, 
     9, Alejandro, 5, and Miguel, 1, to think of themselves as 
     they do--as Dominicans and Hispanics.
       ``Without being blinded by the fact that they undoubtedly 
     have to mark a little box that says Hispanic, I don't think 
     my kids see themselves as dark skinned,'' Collado said. 
     ``Skin color is not the most important thing. I would rather 
     my kids know who they are.''
       Such an outlook on race is prevalent among many Latin 
     Americans, who prefer to view themselves as a diverse group 
     united by culture and language.
       ``In their own countries, national identity is so important 
     that racial identity isn't as important,'' said Helen Safa, 
     a retired professor of Anthropology and Latin American 
     Studies at the University of Florida.
       ``That doesn't mean there is no prejudice and 
     discrimination,'' Safa said. ``There is. But racial identity 
     tends to be subordinated to the national identity.''
       Harrison and other demographers say it's possible that 
     future generations of Hispanics and other immigrants of mixed 
     heritage could classify themselves more along racial lines. 
     But it is just as possible that they will not.
       For much of the nation's history, however, the racial 
     divide was such that the children of interracial marriages--
     as well as black immigrants--found a home only in black 
     America.
       Moreover, until about three decades ago, 16 states had laws 
     designed to prevent marriages between people of different 
     races. Then, in 1967, the Supreme Court ruled anti-
     miscegenation laws unconstitutional.
       Since then, the climate of intolerance and separation that 
     led to such laws has faded. The number of mixed marriages has 
     steadily risen, as has the number of people of African 
     descent and mixed ancestry who have immigrated to the United 
     States.
       But even today, mixed couples often must overcome barriers. 
     Though more common, such unions are not universally accepted. 
     Often, the sternest opposition still comes from family 
     members.
       That's what Trayce Denise Santoro, who is black, discovered 
     four years ago when she married her husband Filippo, the son 
     of Italian immigrants.
       ``His mother and father were completely against it,'' said 
     Santoro, 36, of West Palm Beach. ``They didn't come to the 
     wedding or anything. They didn't want to meet me.''
       Since then, however, Santoro's in-laws have warmed to her 
     and she does not hold their feelings against them. Santoro 
     even wants her children, 2-year-old Filippo II and Lena 
     Marina, 3 months, to learn how to speak Italian so they can 
     better enjoy their dual heritage.
       When Trayce Santoro looks at her two children, she sees 
     both black and white--the way she hopes they will also will 
     view themselves. That's why she supports the efforts to 
     establish a new multiracial category on the Census and other 
     forms.
       ``I would prefer them to choose multiracial if biracial 
     isn't on the list or they couldn't choose (both) black and 
     white,'' she said. ``I wouldn't want them to pick one or the 
     other.''
       Sociologists say it's no surprise that multiracial and 
     multiethnic people are beginning to reject the nation's 
     outdated racial codes.
       Sarah Willie, a professor of sociology and black studies at 
     Swarthmore College in Swarthmore, Pa., outside Philadelphia, 
     said civil rights leaders and black nationalists laid the 
     groundwork for the nation's broader racial and ethnic 
     framework a generation ago.
       That African-Americans could celebrate their roots made it 
     possible for today's immigrants to take such pride in their 
     countries of origin.
       No longer so intent upon embracing American culture at the 
     expense of their own, many Hispanics and others now proudly 
     display the flag of their homeland on their cars.
       ``We forget that nobody was putting a flag on their car 30 
     years ago,'' Willie said. ``That was the tail end of a very 
     explicit assimilationist policy in the U.S.
       ``Most immigrants subscribed to that at an incredible cost 
     to language and culture. Ties to the past were lost.''
       She believes integration and the evolving sense of pride 
     multiracial people have developed in their diverse 
     backgrounds has allowed many to redefine themselves.
       ``People will still tend to identify with a group,'' said 
     Willie, who has a black and a white mother. ``But they will 
     say I'm black or Latino or Asian--and I have another parent 
     on the other side.''
       Allowing people to label themselves as they choose may 
     cause waves, however.

[[Page 7012]]

       Some Americans--white and black--are offended when they see 
     others stress nationalistic roots.
       And black Americans may lift an eyebrow when a person they 
     perceive as black acts as if he or she is something else--a 
     sign that being black in the American sense isn't good enough 
     for them.
       But those attitudes, too, will change, said Tanya Simons-
     Oparah, assistant director for outreach for the Broward 
     County Library.
       ``If you choose not to want to identify with black people I 
     feel badly for you because I know the riches and the value of 
     being of African descent,'' said Simons-Oparah, 52, an 
     African-American whose parents are from the Bahamas and 
     Panama. ``We can't claim everybody.''
       Harrison said the degree to which children of mixed 
     marriages claim ``multiracial'' as an identity will help 
     determine how far the changes in attitude go.
       ``When we look at some of the earlier success for the 
     multiracial categories (on test Census surveys and school 
     district forms, for example) about 50 percent of the people 
     who exercised that option were under 18,'' Harrison said. 
     It's reflective of the recent acceptance of mixed marriage, 
     he said.
       If Masters is any indication, the change in identification 
     will come because biracial offspring don't want to pretend as 
     if one of their two parents doesn't exist. Even if they 
     consider themselves black, as she does.
       ``I can't possibly choose between them,'' Masters said. 
     ``They're both from very rich cultures and I have to respect 
     them both.''

     

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