[Congressional Record Volume 159, Number 87 (Tuesday, June 18, 2013)]
[House]
[Pages H3750-H3756]
From the Congressional Record Online through the Government Publishing Office [www.gpo.gov]
{time} 2000
FATHERHOOD
The SPEAKER pro tempore. Under the Speaker's announced policy of
January 3, 2013, the gentlewoman from Missouri (Mrs. Hartzler) is
recognized for 60 minutes as the designee of the majority leader.
Mrs. HARTZLER. Mr. Speaker, Father's Day was this past Sunday, and I
am very thankful that I had an opportunity to spend some time with my
father, with my sister and her family. Everybody was there. I had an
opportunity to thank him for the role that he has meant and continues
to mean in our lives, and to thank him for that. It was also an
opportunity for my daughter and I to do something special for my
husband.
But, you know, Father's Day also presents us with the great
opportunity to focus on the importance of fathers in this country. The
presence of a father has such a tremendous impact on the life of each
and every child and adult in America. A father serves to provide a
sense of protection, guidance, and above all, love for their child.
Fathers also push their children to pursue their dreams and to never
give up.
I think of my own father, Ted Zellmer, and the profound influence
that he has had on my life. Not only has he taught me the meaning of
hard work and dedication, but he has supported me throughout my entire
life to where I am today, representing the
[[Page H3751]]
good people of Missouri. That's what good fathers do and why they are
so important. We learn a lot from fathers--whether it's how to drive a
tractor and shoot a free throw, like my dad showed me, or how to fix an
engine or play baseball. Dads teach us. They also show us how to live
by example.
Children learn the importance of work and dedication to providing for
the family when they see their dad leave for his job each day. They
learn the importance of faith when he takes his family to church on
Sunday. And they learn the value of family when he prioritizes his time
to eat dinner with them each night, or to coach their Little League
team.
We need good fathers now more than ever. Their importance is
paramount to another discussion taking place in our Nation, and that is
the value of marriage in America. Along with Father's Day, June will
also bring an important announcement: the Supreme Court's much-
anticipated rulings on both the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) and
Proposition 8. These cases have put the national spotlight on this
issue in a new way, and provide an opportunity for Americans to discuss
the question: What is marriage?
It's not complicated. Marriage exists to bring a man and woman
together as husband and wife, to become the father and mother for any
children that come from that union. Marriage is based on the biological
fact that reproduction depends on a man and a woman and the reality
that children need a mother and a father. Redefining marriage would
further distance marriage from the needs of children. It would deny as
a matter of policy the ideal that a child needs a mom and a dad. We
know that children do best when raised by a mother and a father.
President Obama is also a strong advocate for the importance of a
strong male figure in a child's life. With firsthand experience of
growing up without a father, the President works every day to be a
great dad for his two daughters. The Obama administration has created
many new programs under his Fatherhood Initiative Program, including
under Fatherhood Buzz and Healthy Marriage and Responsible Fatherhood
Initiative.
During his speech, President Obama said:
Too many fathers are missing from too many lives and too
many homes, having abandoned their responsibilities, acting
like boys instead of men.
And then he goes on. The President says:
We know the statistics--that children who grow up without a
father are five times more likely to live in poverty and to
commit crime, nine times more likely to drop out of schools,
and 20 times more likely to end up in prison. They are more
likely to have behavioral problems or to run away from home
or become teenage parents themselves, and the foundations of
our community are weaker because of it.
Clearly, we all agree on the critical role fathers play in the lives
of their children, which is why we should continue to affirm marriage
as the union of a man and a woman in the interest of children. Every
child deserves a mom and a dad. You cannot say that fathers are
essential while also making them optional. That's why we're here
tonight, to make a case for fathers. Too many times in society, they
are viewed as optional. Hollywood shows often depict them as buffoons.
We know different, and are here to set the record straight. It's time
to honor the fathers of America for the vital role they play in not
only our families, but also the stability and the well-being of our
Nation. It's time to show the respect that is due them, encourage men
to be better fathers for their children, and champion the vital role
they play in marriage.
I'm joined tonight by several of my colleagues, and I appreciate them
taking the time to visit about this very, very important topic. I have
my good friend from Kansas, Tim Huelskamp here, and he certainly is a
person who knows a lot about being a good father because he certainly
is one, and I yield to Tim Huelskamp.
Mr. HUELSKAMP. Thank you, Congresswoman Hartzler. I appreciate you
leading our efforts and discussion tonight on a very important topic.
Obviously, as you do mention, it is oftentimes a forgotten topic. I'm
certain we all have our stories about our dads, and I was really
blessed and still blessed with a very active and involved father. I
will just say as a farm kid, probably the most poignant story I do
recall with my dad was after a hailstorm. You know, being a farm gal
yourself, the damage a hailstorm does to the family, does to the
economy, and does to your crops. We were sitting out in the yard, and
there were 3 or 4 inches of hail all around. And we listened to it
bounce off the roof of the pickup for 30 minutes, and then it stopped.
I said, Oh, gosh what's going to happen next? What's dad going to say?
He put the pickup in gear, and then we drove around in silence for
another hour, and then we got out and we went back to work. That's the
kind of message that I learned from my dad--you don't give up. You roll
with the punches, and you keep doing that.
But tonight, I don't want to talk just about my father or my
children, although I would love to do that. My wife and I have not been
blessed with any of our own biological children. We have been blessed
with four adopted children. So there are four sets of moms and dads out
there that have dedicated children that are in our care.
One thing I do want to speak directly to fathers who are listening
today, and fathers, I want to challenge you to be a hero for your
children. I want to challenge you to be responsible, committed husbands
to the mothers of your children. I challenge you to live out fatherhood
courageously, but to live this courageous, responsible, heroic role as
father, it requires marriage: marriage truly understood as the
exclusive and permanent union between one man and one woman coming
together to become husband and wife, mother and father to the children.
I would also like to speak to all of America, as I know my colleague
has done. It is vital that we encourage fatherhood in the context of
marriage and uphold policies that reflect the truth, the truth that
fathers are not optional, but they play a vital role to their families,
and restoring America must begin on the home front. It begins with
encouraging and supporting committed, responsible fatherhood in the
context of marriage.
We know who the victims of the vicious fatherless cycle are: they are
our children. It is our children, the children of America, who are left
to suffer the scars of the abandonment of their absentee fathers. As my
colleague noted and quoted the President, he was accurate when he said
we know the statistics, and yet I'll repeat them because they're so
powerful:
Children who grow up without a father are four times more
likely to live in poverty and to commit crime; nine times
more likely to drop out of schools and 20 times more likely
to have behavioral problems or run away from home. The
foundations of our community are weaker because of
fatherlessness.
Furthermore, absent fathers don't just hurt our children, they wound
society. It is a fact that the welfare state has to expand when
marriage and families decline. It has been estimated over $229 billion
in welfare costs from 1970 to 1996 can be attributed to the breakdown
of marriage. And specifically, a study in 2008, 1 year alone,
estimating that divorce and unwed childbearing cost American taxpayers
over $120 billion a year.
{time} 2010
This was a study of more than 5 or 6 years ago. Where there are
absentee fathers, it's you, I, your families, our families, our
communities, our churches, our neighbors, our cities, and the
government, we're all forced to step in and try to pick up the broken
pieces of these shattered marriages.
This is not fair to mothers and children. Wives deserve committed
husbands. Children deserve protective, responsible fathers.
The facts speak for themselves. But one story I will note, and then
I'll close quickly, is it was not far from here a few weeks ago I was
crossing a crowded street here in Washington, D.C., and there was a
line of kids. I think they were with a babysitter. And there was about
a 2-year-old young boy, and he looked at his babysitter as he's
crossing the street. She's dragging him across. And he asked again, I
could hear him. He says, ``Who is my daddy? Who is my daddy?'' And that
babysitter didn't have an answer. ``Shhh. Don't worry about that.'' He
kept asking the question, ``Who is my daddy?''
We should have an answer. We should have an answer for that little
boy. We
[[Page H3752]]
should have an answer because we should know. We should expect, we
should demand, we should promote, we should push fathers, encourage
them, demand of them to hold up their responsibilities, because there
is a disease in America, and it's the disease of fatherlessness.
We must overcome the myths in society that see no difference in
whether a mom or a dad is involved in a child's life, because it is,
there is no doubt. You can look at tons and tons of social science data
over and over. It's very clear.
But for that 2-year-old boy, that 3-year-old boy, we have to have an
answer who is his daddy. And the daddy is not the government. He has a
daddy. He should be involved. Our policies should reflect that goal,
because every child deserves both a mom and a dad.
And I look forward, hopefully, as we continue to press forward and
solve these problems, we promote marriage and promote fatherhood.
I appreciate your leadership tonight, Vicky, for your efforts here.
Mrs. HARTZLER. Thank you so much, Tim. I think you spoke so
eloquently to the importance of fathers and the cost that we have, as a
society, when fathers are not present and why it's important to have a
policy that promotes the father being there for their children.
And now I'd like to yield to the gentleman from Georgia and hear what
he has to say about the importance of fathers. Thank you, Phil Gingrey.
Mr. GINGREY of Georgia. Mr. Speaker, I appreciate so much the
gentlelady from Missouri (Mrs. Hartzler) for leading this time on
fatherhood. And what a perfect time to do it this evening. We all just
came back from our districts and celebrated Father's Day or
Grandfather's Day.
And of course we're also awaiting, some time soon, before the end of
June, a decision, a momentous decision from the Supreme Court in regard
to two particular decisions: the one ballot initiative from California,
Proposition 8, where the people of California fairly convincingly
decided what is a definition of traditional marriage; and, of course,
the other thing is the Defense of Marriage Act passed right here on
this floor and signed into law by President Clinton back in 1996.
So this is timely, and I commend the gentlewoman from Missouri for
bringing it forward and giving us an opportunity to join with our
colleagues and talk about something as important as this, that is, the
definition of fatherhood and how important a father is to a child.
But maybe even more important than that, a mother and a father. We
don't always have the ideal situation, but that's certainly no reason
to throw up our hands and say let's forget about our faith and family
and traditional values and what's best, what is the best circumstance
for a child.
My colleagues, I think a lot about my own children. Of course they're
adults now, and among them, they have 13 grandchildren--our
grandchildren, their children. And at least one of my son-in-laws had
no father present when he was growing up. And that father didn't come
to his wedding. That father was not there for the birth of any of his
four children. That father just basically denies his existence.
And I watch that particular son-in-law, and my son and my other son-
in-laws, but particularly him, because of the experience that he went
through as a child, how much he loves his children, how kind and caring
and loving he is and how important he is in their lives.
And I realize today that the ``Father Knows Best'' and that
traditional view that we all had back in the old days of television is
different. It's changed, and I do understand that.
Of my three daughters and one daughter-in-law, they all work. They
all work, some of them full-time, some of them part-time. But they're
still there as moms. And when they come home and take over that
responsibility, they need a shared partner, and that partner is that
partner for life. And I'm talking about, of course, the father.
And so I really appreciate the opportunity to be with my colleagues
tonight and just say that, you know, maybe part of the problem is we
need to go back into the schools at a very early age, maybe at the
grade school level, and have a class for the young girls and have a
class for the young boys and say, you know, this is what's important.
This is what a father does that is maybe a little different, maybe a
little bit better than the talents that a mom has in a certain area;
and the same thing for the young girls, that, you know, this is what a
mom does and this is what is important from the standpoint of that
union which we call marriage, and we have called it that since the
beginning of this country and long before the beginning of this
country.
So as I close and yield back to the gentlelady and thank her for
giving me some time, I stand strongly for the Defense of Marriage Act
and traditional marriage as we know it, and don't take that right away
from our States.
But this is a wonderful opportunity to say, young men, you've got a
great responsibility. You're not a father unless you prove it.
Mrs. HARTZLER. Thank you so much, Phil. That's well spoken from a
proud grandfather as well as a father, and certainly brought up the
importance of fatherhood as well as these decisions that are coming up
from the Supreme Court.
You know, the people have spoken on that. The people of California
spoke two times, and they said, This is what we think is wise public
policy for the families and the citizens of California. And the people
spoke on the Defense of Marriage Act through their elected
representatives here in Congress, a huge vote, bipartisan. And
President Clinton signed the bill. The people have spoken on this.
And what we don't want is to have the Supreme Court impose their view
or be activists and impose their view of what marriage should be on the
citizens who have spoken, so it's going to be interesting to see how
they rule.
But certainly, I agree with you, Phil, that it's very important that
the people have spoken and that we uphold marriage.
Next we have a Representative from Oklahoma, a friend of mine, James
Lankford, who not only is a great dad and father, but has worked with
teenagers for many years and, I'm sure, has seen the importance of
fatherhood as it relates to young people.
So go ahead, James Lankford.
Mr. LANKFORD. I thank the gentlelady for hosting this time.
There's a lot of things I've talked about in the well of this House.
I've talked about budget. I've talked about a growing economy, about
jobs. I've talked about transportation. I've talked about the
relationship of the individual citizen and their government and how
that relationship works--or sometimes it doesn't work lately.
But this is a time just to be able to pause for a moment and not talk
about necessarily some new government law or some new regulation, but
to celebrate, for just a moment, dads, with Father's Day this past
weekend, and to be able to hesitate again and to be able to say thanks
to my own dad, but to also talk about the fact that it is the love of
our life for men to be able to enjoy their children, just like it is
for ladies to be able to enjoy their children, as well, as a mom.
There is something very unique--and I believe firmly that every child
needs a mom and needs a dad. They come at parenting from two different
directions and they, together, make such a dramatic difference in the
life of a child, to have a mom and to have a dad.
It's interesting to me that the last verse in the Old Testament, in
that verse from Malachi 4:6 in that minor prophet book, it ends that
Old Testament by saying the role of the prophet will be to turn the
hearts of the children to their fathers and to turn the hearts of their
fathers to the children, to be able to see that restoration.
{time} 2020
In that time period, there was a collapse for a moment in the
families, and they suffered as a nation and saw that. We see that today
in our own families. Fifteen million children live life without a
father--15 million. In 1960, there were only 11 percent of the homes
that didn't have a father. Today, it's over one-third of the homes that
don't have a father. As we watch all the consequences that occur with
that in our own economy, in our own family, and in our own culture,
it's just the separation that happens.
We see a greater emphasis right now with trying to figure out what to
do in
[[Page H3753]]
schools as parents seem to be disconnected from their children and
teachers struggle in the community, and things have changed in our
schools with an absence of fathers.
As we've seen the families collapse, we've seen an increase in
poverty. Some colleagues were here earlier speaking about hunger in
America, which is rampant and is a huge issue for us as a nation. They
mentioned that in the 1970s we had a very low hunger rate in America.
It's interesting for us to come here now and talk about fathers and how
that has changed, and from that point in 1970 when we had a very low
hunger rate in America, we look at the difference now with a very high
hunger rate in America and also a very low presence of fathers in the
lives of their children. We've seen something different happen in
families as fathers disconnect from their children and they no longer
see a role to be able to be a provider and they've required government
to go be the provider for children when it was never designed to be
that way. And that's not where it is best.
Children have a higher risk of poverty. Children have a lower
graduation rate from high school and have a lower entry rate into
college. There is not a safe environment for children when there's an
absence of a dad and a mom. It's different for them as they grow up and
as they process through things without the stability that can come to a
child with the presence of a mom and of a dad.
So what do we do about it is the challenge. Well, quite frankly,
there are issues in our marriage laws right now as a nation that we
have where there are penalties to be married in our tax law. There are
penalties even in our disability benefits as we try and reach in and
help families as they're disabled, but yet if they're married, it's a
lower rate. So we look at that, and we ask the question: Why would we
punish a family for being married because one of the individuals there
is disabled? That doesn't make sense for us.
So we need to look at our policies that we have and be able to
encourage rather than discourage marriage. Because we know when that
happens--it's the reason that the Federal Government is involved at all
in the marriage relationship is because we know what happens in the
lives of children when a man and a woman are committed to each other
for life. That commitment, the reason the government is connected to
that is because of what happens in the lives of children and how it
benefits people in the days ahead. So we need to look at the marriage
penalty that's occurring in our tax law and our disability rules and
such.
But, quite frankly, most of the issues that deal with fatherhood and
from the absence of fathers won't happen because of a change in Federal
law. It will happen when families turn and mentor young couples and
they get personally involved in the lives of young families. Some
individuals have never seen a functioning man and a woman married and
committed to each other for life. They've never seen that in their
community, and they haven't experienced that in their own family. It's
so important for older couples to mentor young couples and to pass on
the wisdom that they have gained.
It is, quite frankly, very important at the marriage altar for two
individuals to truly commit to each other for life. That brings
stability not only to those two individuals, but it also brings
stability to the children where they grow up in a home where there's
some emotional security and safety and not the constant fear of
separation and of loss of either the mom or the dad. So for individuals
to be committed to each other for life makes a big difference in that.
So what can happen? I talked about the Federal policies, but it's
really individuals, individuals mentoring other individuals, and it's
two individuals when they approach the marriage altar knowing that
we're going to commit to each other and we're going to work through the
problems that we have because that's what's best for our Nation, and
that's what's best for the children that are coming up to provide them
that stable home where they can grow up.
Do we always get it perfect? No. But we know economically and we know
emotionally that the strongest homes and what's best for our children
is for a mom and a dad. And I want to honor dads that do commit to walk
through the hard, difficult days and to say to them, Keep going. Don't
give up, dads. And as you face through hard times, your children need
you.
The single most difficult part of my job is getting on an airplane on
Monday mornings and flying away from my two daughters and my wife. No
other moment of my week is harder than that one, because I know the
importance of being a dad to my daughters, and they need me.
I encourage dads today to live out the commitment that you have made
to your wife and the commitment that you've made to your children.
Mrs. HARTZLER. Great, great words. Thank you, James. What a word of
encouragement, how to commit and to keep on going and to be good dads
and the need to strengthen marriage in this country. So thank you for
those very, very excellent comments.
Now I would like to call on another colleague from Oklahoma, a
freshman this year who has hit the ground running, and we are really
glad he is here. Jim Bridenstine, I would like to yield to you and hear
what you would like to share about the importance of fathers.
Mr. BRIDENSTINE. I appreciate that. It is an honor to be here, and
thank you for inviting me to participate in this.
I have been certainly accused of maybe being critical of the
President from time to time, as many of us Republicans are sometimes,
but I'd like to share a few points where we agree, the President and I.
I've got a number of quotes here, and I think these quotes cross party
lines and certainly indicate how important fathers are in the lives of
their children.
Here is a quote from our President, Barack Obama:
We need fathers to realize that responsibility doesn't end
at conception. We need them to realize that what makes you a
man is not the ability to have a child; it's the courage to
raise one.
Here is another quote from our President:
I wish I had a father who was around and involved.
That's a profound statement, and certainly it shows a great deal of
courage by our President to say that.
I remember when I was a young child in the Cub Scouts, the Pinewood
Derby came around every year. My father, my brother, and I would spend
a great deal of time weighing our little Pinewood Derby car to make
sure that it weighed precisely 5 ounces. We would spend all night
graphiting the wheels because we wanted our little Pinewood Derby car
to be the absolute fastest car that we could possibly make it. Whether
we won or lost, it didn't matter. We were going to make this little car
as fast as we could possibly make it.
I also remember not too long ago my 7-year-old, who was 6, wanted to
participate in the Pinewood Derby in the Cub Scouts himself. And
because of my relationship that I had with my father and the time that
we spent involved in that project, it was a desire of my heart to be
involved in his Pinewood Derby to the same extent. And I'm proud to say
that when I was a child, we won the Pinewood Derby; and I'm proud to
say that as Walker's dad, together we won the Pinewood Derby when he
was 6 years old. These are the things that I think are critically
important in the life of a child.
Some other quotes from our President: Obama has said that his hardest
but the most rewarding job is being a father. I think that is
absolutely true, as well.
I want to quote some statistics here:
Currently there are 24 million children in America living in a home
without their biological father.
The World Family Map report by Child Trends found that even when
controlling for income, children who live with both parents have better
educational outcomes than children living with one or no parents.
Fathers play an important role in teaching children life lessons and
preparing them to succeed in school and in life.
Some other quotes:
According to the National Fatherhood Initiative, a father's
involvement in education of his children is associated with a higher
probability of A's for their children.
Interestingly, I remember when I was in fourth grade, there was a
competition called Math Olympiads. My dad
[[Page H3754]]
was a mathematician, and he came from a family of mathematicians. And
my dad would spend hours with me working on these math problems that
were really college-level math problems. We would go over and over
these problems again and again. I remember in fourth grade, when it
came time to do Math Olympiads, there were just five problems, and if
you could get one or two of them right, it was really tremendous for a
fourth grader. I remember at the end of the first Math Olympiad, I had
four out of five correct. And it wasn't because I was smart, and it
wasn't because I was brilliant. It had nothing to do with that at all--
in fact, quite the contrary. But what it had to do with was the fact
that I had a dad who was so engaged, so involved, and so interested in
making sure not that I would get an A in the class--quite frankly, that
was really not relevant to him. What he cared about was whether I
learned the material.
{time} 2030
I remember taking tests in sixth grade. I would do the math problems
entirely different than how the teacher taught and the teacher would
count it wrong. My dad would go to the school and he would say, you
know, he may have done it differently than you taught him, but he did
it the way we taught at home because he's preparing for higher math in
a different year.
Having a dad involved in your education that way is something that
was tremendously important to me as I was growing up. And certainly,
now that I am a father myself and I have a child in first, now soon to
be second grade--and of course other children on the way that are
entering kindergarten and a 1-year old at home, these are areas where
it's important for me.
There is a generational trend. When a child has that impact from
their father, certainly it's an impact on them that they want to have
on their own children. So that's why it is so important for fathers to
be involved in the lives of their children. That's my personal
experience.
Children with involved fathers are more likely to do well in school.
They have a better sense of well-being, they have fewer behavioral
problems. When fathers are actively involved in the upbringing of their
children, their children demonstrate greater self control and a greater
ability to take initiative.
Along with Father's Day, this June will also bring an important
announcement--the Supreme Court's much-anticipated rulings on both the
Defense of Marriage Act and Proposition 8. These cases have put the
national spotlight on this issue in a new way and provide an
opportunity for Americans to discuss the question: What is marriage?
Marriage exists to bring a man and a woman together as husband and
wife, to be a father and a mother to children, and the institution of
marriage is intended for life. This is very important when it comes to
the rearing of children.
A few more statistics. In 2012, about one-third of all children lived
in families without their biological father present. According to some
estimates, as many as 50 percent of children who are currently under
age 18 will spend or have spent a significant portion of their
childhood in a home without their biological father.
Research indicates that children raised in single-parent families are
more likely than children raised in two-parent families, with both
biological parents, to do poorly in school, have emotional and
behavioral problems, become teenage parents, and have poverty-level
incomes.
In 2011, the poverty rate for children living in homes without a
father was 48 percent, compared with 11 percent for children living
with married-couple families. Single-parent families are more likely to
be poor than two-parent families, especially if the lone parent is the
mother. That's why it's so important for fathers, and that's why I
commend the President when he talks about the importance of fathers.
Here's a final quote from our President:
As fathers, we need to be involved in our children's lives
not just when it's convenient or easy, and not just when
they're doing well, but when it's difficult and thankless,
and they're struggling. That is when they need us most.
With that, I thank the gentlelady from Missouri.
Mrs. HARTZLER. Thank you so much, Jim. I really enjoyed hearing the
stories about your father and the role that he played. You know, I
think every child in that derby was a winner who had a father who
helped make their little pine box with them. It really is important and
makes a huge difference. So thanks for sharing that.
Now I'd like to yield my time to Congressman Trent Franks from
Arizona, who is certainly a champion for so many of these issues that
are so important to us today, and to fathers and families.
Mr. FRANKS of Arizona. Well, I just thank the gentlelady, Mr.
Speaker, because she has demonstrated such a wonderful presence in this
body. She has been a gift to all of us. I know that each person who has
preceded me at this platform is grateful for Congresswoman Vicky
Hartzler. I wish there were about another 200 like her and I might just
go home. But I really appreciate her so much.
Mr. Speaker, it's been said that a father is a man who expects his
children to be as good as he meant to be. I have yet to meet a father
who doesn't want to convey his own mistakes to his children. He wants
his children to learn from his mistakes, to give his children the best
possible start in life, serving as a springboard from which to face the
day-to-day challenges that ultimately come. But I really don't think
that's such a comprehensive definition.
Those of us who are privileged to be in a Christian family believe
that there is a loftier image of fatherhood, that there is One after
whom we model our inevitably flawed attempts to raise our children with
love and wisdom, a perfect father who gives us ``every good and perfect
gift,'' who is a father to the fatherless and a help in times of need
to the widow and the oppressed. And it is only in having children
sometimes that we begin to understand just a little glimpse of how our
heavenly Father feels about the rest of us.
To most women, their father was their first love. To most men, their
father was their first larger-than-life idol. The role a father plays
in the life of his children simply cannot be overstated. That fact, Mr.
Speaker, that knowledge that little eyes are watching every move we
make, often emulating what they see for good or bad, no matter what we
do, we will never feel quite fully equipped to do justice to the sacred
responsibility to which God has entrusted us.
There is a famous saying that the greatest gift a father can give his
children is to love their mother. And the point of that quote of course
is that a healthy, intact home gives a child the best possible chance
at pursuing and achieving their dreams.
But for all its difficulties, what a sweet and blessed honor it is to
be entrusted with the task of raising these little human images of
unconditional love. I've said it before, Mr. Speaker, and I believe
with every passing day that every baby that is born comes with a
message from God that He has not yet despaired of mankind on Earth. Yet
I look around at the state of the American family, Mr. Speaker, that
bedrock institution that is responsible more than any other factor for
inculcating the truth into the hearts and minds of each new generation,
and I believe that it is facing a grave and profound challenge in
America.
A mentor and a friend of mine, Gary Bauer, recently wrote an article
on this very subject. He was highlighting the state of affairs in which
so many Americans find themselves without the firm, guiding, loving
hand of a father.
Indeed, Mr. Speaker, 40 percent of children are now born to unmarried
parents, including a majority of children born to women 30 years old or
younger. A recent study in Richmond, Virginia, found that 60 percent of
families in the city have just one parent--usually the mother--at home.
Among black residents, it's 86 percent of homes that are single
parents.
A related Pew study estimated that women, when they are the prime
breadwinners--and they are in 40 percent of American households--that,
unfortunately, the majority of these households are led by a single
mother who averages just $23,000 in annual income, whereas intact
families average about $80,000 a year in income, by comparison.
Eighty-five percent of all young men--or even, for that matter,
middle-
[[Page H3755]]
aged men--in prison came from a family that never had a functional
father figure in their midst--85 percent.
Mr. Speaker, it is an understatement to suggest to you that children
are so desperately in need of both a mother and a father. And I know no
better way to really illustrate that than just to try to tell the story
of three fathers.
The first story I will tell is of one father named Earl Carr. He was
my grandfather. Earl Carr was a coal miner. When he was just in his
mid-twenties, a terrible cave-in crushed his friends, killed most of
them, and broke his back. So as a child, I remember growing up when my
grandfather could carry a coal bucket for maybe 40 or 50 feet, but then
he would have to sit down. But he never abandoned his family, and he
was always there in every way that he could be.
Just to illustrate to you how sometimes a grandfather can have a big
impact on a grandson, more than 45 years has passed--and I hope I can
remember it--but he used to be very fond of the ``Coal Miner's Ode,''
and it goes something like this:
Come and listen, you fellers, so young and so fine, and seek
not your fortune in the dark dreary mine. It will form
as a habit and seep in your soul 'til the stream of
your blood runs as black as the coal.
Because it's dark as a dungeon, damp as the dew where the
danger is double and the pleasures are few.
Where the rain never falls and the sun never shines, it's
dark as a dungeon way down in the mines. And I hope
when I'm gone and the ages shall roll, my body will
blacken and turn into coal. And I will look from the
door of my heavenly home and I'll pity the miner
digging my bones. Because it's dark as a dungeon, damp
as the dew, where the danger is double and the
pleasures are few,
where the rain never falls and the sun never shines, it's
dark as a dungeon way down in the mines.
{time} 2040
I don't remember the last time I said that, Mr. Speaker, but I do
know that it was over 40 years ago that I learned it, and a grandfather
does have a lasting impact on our lives.
So now I will tell you another story of another father, and he's my
father--a man named Taylor Franks. I won't go into--because I don't
remember--how he was there for me when I was a baby and had some
congenital defects and probably wouldn't have had the opportunity to be
standing in this well had it not been for a faithful father, but I'll
tell you just one story.
Years ago in the little town when I was growing up, I came away from
the playground one day when I was about 5 or 6 years old, maybe 6 years
old. And I came through an alley, and you know how it always is. There
is sometimes a bunch of guys that want to demonstrate their macho
capability. I walked past the fence and one of them yelled something at
me and there was a rock fight that ensued. Now, they were behind the
fence and there were several of them. I was out there alone and I was
losing this battle very demonstrably. I would pick up one rock and
throw it back because I didn't want to be discomforted by this band of
ruffians, you understand. But I was losing, and I thought, Boy, what am
I going to do? I am going to have to run, it looks like. And just at
the moment when I was probably in the peak of my panic, all of a sudden
the rocks stopped, everything was still, and I could see them peaking
over the fence at me. I noticed a little carefully. It seemed like they
were looking at something behind me. I turned and it was Taylor Franks.
He said, How about me evening up the sides here just a little bit? He
evened up the sides many, many times.
He's 87 years old now. But I'll tell you, if the communists ever come
to this country to take us over, they better go around that old
gentleman's house because they'll get more than they bargained for.
This is a man that loves his country, loves his God, and loves his
family. I have no words to express my gratitude to him.
So I will tell you about another father, who almost didn't think he
was going to be one. But he calls his little boy ``little feller,''
because that's what his daddy called him. And his name is Joshua Lane,
and he's my boy. He's got a sister, a twin sister. She's 5 minutes
younger. Of course he takes care of her. But I can say to you that
there is no greater gift on this Earth than these children.
Somehow, I guess, the point of all this, Mr. Speaker, is just to
remind all of us that are fathers what they meant to us and what we
mean to our children. Sometimes I have to watch mine grow up at a
distance, but they know their daddy loves them and they know their
daddy is here so that we can make a better future for them.
I guess my challenge to the fathers of this country is to be reminded
that your children grow up so quickly and your impact on them will be
profound beyond any words that I could ever articulate. They say that
great societies finally come when old men plant trees under whose shade
they will never sit. I believe that to be true, that our greatest jobs
as fathers is to make sure that our children have the inculcated truths
that will help them find their way home and through the great storms of
life. We should always remind ourselves that they are, indeed, the
living messages that we send to a time we will never see ourselves.
I hope that somehow that fathers of this country will recognize the
gift that they've been given and they will recognize the impact that
they will have, and that the rest of society will recognize that if we
displace fathers in our country, we will bankrupt us all trying to
replace them.
With that, Mr. Speaker and Congresswoman Hartzler, I yield back.
Mrs. HARTZLER. Thank you so much, Representative Franks. I couldn't
say it any better I think. Thank you.
The heritage that he has given his children and that his father gave
him and his grandfather gave him, that's what it's about is being able
to pass on that heritage to your children. That's why we have a policy
in our country that encourages fathers to be there for their children,
so that every child has a chance to have a mother and a father.
I am glad to be joined today by a gentleman from California, Doug
LaMalfa.
Thank you for coming tonight. I look forward to hearing what you have
to share on this very important topic.
Mr. LaMALFA Mr. Speaker, I thank my colleague, Mrs. Hartzler, for
holding this time here tonight for us.
Let's talk about the importance of fatherhood and what all that
means. I really appreciate the words of my colleague from Arizona who
just spoke and his eloquent way of doing that.
We are in a nation here that really cries out for the type of values
that are represented by what is called the nuclear family--kids these
days, with so many temptations and so many things out there that will
pull them in all different directions. They need a mom and they need a
dad.
We know statistically, just talking numbers, that the chances of
success for children to grow up and be successful in their own lives,
not in poverty, not in abusive situations, the percentages are so much
higher when there's a loving mom and a dad in their lives.
We have very important tasks, very important jobs here in this place.
Mr. Speaker, when we make policy here, we always need to make it in
such a way that supports the family, that strengthens the family and
doesn't weaken it or in some fashion even use the State, use the
government, as usurping the role of the parent or of a dad like we've
seen so much with maybe the start of the great society--well-
intentioned things that have gone on to, in many ways, replace the
father in people's lives. There needs to be that accountability to come
back and bring that unit together.
Thinking of my own dad--we lost him almost 5 years ago now--he was
always a strong and pretty quiet leader, but he could just give you
``the look'' pretty much and set you back on track. He had to spend a
lot of hours out on the farm. We didn't always get to see him all the
time when it was busy in the springtime with planting or with harvest,
but we always knew, my sisters and I, that he was there for us. He
didn't get to every ball game, but we always knew. We never had to
question his dedication and commitment to us and to our mother, because
moms are in it, too. We know that certainly because, typically, mostly
the caregiver for kids a lot of times, she needs that support, too,
that comes from that committed family unit.
So we have to make policy, we have to make things that support that
in
[[Page H3756]]
this place. I'm so disappointed with the direction our country has gone
the last 40 to 50 years that has broken that apart.
I have an obligation to my wife and my four kids. One of the most
difficult things in contemplating what goes on with this role of
service that I've been blessed with by the voters in my district is the
time away from home. Being from the west coast, it's a heck of a
commitment. With a 5-hour plane ride each way and all that, you don't
just get to pop in like when I was in the State legislature in
Sacramento and you get home most nights.
That's the kind of thing that keeps me worrying sometimes, worrying a
little bit: Am I doing right by my kids? We do this here--I think
anyone that runs for office--ostensibly with the idea that we're trying
to help the next generation and preserve the country and preserve our
freedoms. But there's a sacrifice in this job. It kind of all comes
back to perspective.
Father's Day, the other day, I got to spend home with the family. All
my kids either got me a little something or made a little card. Very,
very touching things said in those cards reminded me that, yeah, we are
here trying to do something for them, preserve their rights, their
opportunities, their liberties, and that they understand, even though I
don't always get to be home, that it is for them.
{time} 2050
So that makes me feel good about doing this--about taking on the huge
issues here, the long hours, the sometimes fruitless battles, and
people looking at us from the outside with our, maybe, 10 percent
approval rating, wondering, What the heck are you doing back there in
Washington, D.C.? We all know we're here for a good reason.
We have an obligation as dads to be there for our wives and for our
kids, which is nothing new, but it's the dedication. They need to know
that we're there for them, that we're fighting for something, whether
it's our more day-to-day jobs--if you're a butcher or a baker or a
candlestick maker--or if you're back here getting to be part of the
U.S. Congress.
The importance of a dad to a son can't be overstated. You need a man
in the life to guide your son to the right path, to be that strong
voice, to keep your son in the position, first of all, of respecting
his mother, of respecting his sisters, of respecting women--of what
that role is supposed to be. They need that, and a lot of them have
lost out on that. It's sad. We see the tragedy. Some of these kids are
walking the streets, and they grow up to be in gangs and so much
because they didn't have that.
A dad has a very strong role with his daughters--to ensure that they
know they have value, that they aren't something to be out there to be
traded, as so often happens when they don't have that fatherly voice
saying, You have value, and you have self-respect--that is so key to
you. It keeps so many times young girls out of trouble and on that good
path.
You can't overstate that role of a father on both sons and daughters
and, of course, that very strong support that's needed for your wife,
who has to watch the home fires when we're off doing things like this.
She needs that.
So what I'm saying to the men who are already fathers or who are
would-be fathers is, you've got a very important task, extremely, the
most important task--to be that leader of your household. You need to
stick with them through thick and thin.
And men, be men. Don't be something else. Grow up. You need to cast
off childish things when you've made that commitment to a woman and to
fatherhood, because they're watching you. Your neighborhood is watching
you. It's the most important thing you'll ever do.
So, Mr. Speaker, I conclude tonight with the thought that, for there
to be one Nation under God, men have a very key role in that. That's
being that father, and that's holding the family together. No matter
what might come and affect it, no matter what legislation or court
decision might try to affect or break that family union or make
confusing decisions for our children, we have that role, and we can be
that guide for their whole lives. It is rewarding for all of us.
With that, I appreciate the time, and I appreciate the gentlelady
from Missouri (Mrs. Hartzler) for leading this discussion here tonight.
Mrs. HARTZLER. I thank the gentleman. That was very, very well said,
and I appreciate your encouraging the men to be leaders of their
households and to make a difference for their children--the next
generation.
I appreciate all of my colleagues who have come tonight so that we
could talk about the importance of the fathers and how important it is
to have marriage strong in our country.
Every child deserves a mom and a dad. You cannot say that fathers are
essential while also making them optional. The presence of a father has
such a tremendous impact on the lives of each and every child and on
every adult in America. Fathers not only represent the success of our
children but also the success of our Nation.
As we get closer to the Supreme Court's ruling concerning the Defense
of Marriage Act, it is crucial that we weigh the entirety of the impact
such a decision will have on families. My colleague from Oklahoma
earlier cited the President in this quote when he stressed the
importance of fathers. I think it's very, very good, and I want to
repeat it.
President Obama said:
As fathers, we need to be involved in our children's lives
not just when it's convenient or easy and not just when
they're doing well--but when it's difficult and thankless,
and they're struggling. That is when they need us most.
Every single child in this country deserves the opportunity to have a
mother and a father. That is why we must uphold marriage. Not only must
we represent the future of our children but also the future of our
Nation.
Mr. Speaker, I yield back the balance of my time.
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