[Congressional Record Volume 147, Number 108 (Monday, July 30, 2001)]
[House]
[Pages H4783-H4784]
From the Congressional Record Online through the Government Publishing Office [www.gpo.gov]
JO OBERSTAR: A TESTIMONIAL, ST. BARTHOLOMEW CHURCH, JULY 30, 1991
The SPEAKER pro tempore. Under the Speaker's announced policy of
January 3, 2001, the gentleman from Minnesota (Mr. Oberstar) is
recognized during morning hour debates for 5 minutes.
Mr. OBERSTAR. Mr. Speaker, 10 years ago my wife Jo succumbed to
breast cancer after an 8-year struggle with that disease. Today in her
memory I deliver the eulogy testimonial I offered in St. Bartholomew
Church on this day.
Marshall Lynam, well known to Hill denizens, tells the story of
Lyndon Johnson who, on learning that his secretary of many years had
been diagnosed with breast cancer, called the chief executive officer
of the Mayo Clinic and said, ``I am sending my secretary out there, and
I want you to cure her, hear?''
The awed and startled, to say the least, CEO responded: ``We will be
glad to treat her, Mr. President, but you have one of the greatest
cancer research and treatment centers in the world, the M.D. Anderson
Clinic, in Houston.''
``You are right,'' said Lyndon. ``I will send her there and make them
cure her.''
{time} 1245
Jo got the best care there was. But cure was not in the forecast. I
want--as she wanted--her doctors to understand that, for the Christian,
death is not defeat. The medical community is so focused on heroic
efforts to extend life that sometimes we forget that death is a natural
consequence of having lived. What matters is the quality of both life
and death.
From the spiritual perspective, all of us were focused wrong: it
wasn't the cancer that needed healing; it was our empty hearts,
yearning for meaning, for purpose and love, which needed healing and
filling.
Jo called us to that vocation of prayer, of love for each other,
especially love for the least among us. Countless were those who said:
``I don't pray very often or too well, but I will for you.'' And they
did. They felt better for it and were healed where it counts most: in
the spirit.
Jo had the roomiest heart I ever knew. She made space in it for
everyone, concerned always and first for the well-being of others.
She found the good in everyone and expanded it, as in: ``That dear
sweet John Dingell'' or, ``Bob Roe is such a honey.'' (To which I
muttered: ``Yes, but you're not trying to get a bridge out of him.'')
Why does a person die at the height of their powers, with seemingly
so much life yet to live? Why a long, lingering illness with so much
suffering?
If you die at 90, there is a sense of life fully lived and people
reflect back on ``a job well done.'' But when death comes to one so
young and vibrant, there is a sense of promise unfulfilled, of life yet
to be lived. Maybe the answer is that we appreciate more fully, more
passionately, the contributions of that young life so untimely taken.
The other question persists just as stubbornly: what is the purpose
of so long a suffering? I believe suffering can only be understood in
the spiritual sense. We had the privilege of suffering with Jo; to be
spiritually purified by that suffering, and the opportunity to heal
ourselves. It also gave us time to say good-bye in real ways.
Two years ago, the Speaker appointed me to the President's Commission
on Aviation Security and Terrorism, the Pan Am 103 Commission. Our
inquiry took us to Lockerbie, Scotland, where the constable of Dumfries
told the commission members of the many long hours he and his staff
spent with family members responding patiently to their myriad
questions about that senseless tragedy. When I asked why he felt it
important to spend so much time with the family members, the constable
replied: ``They never got to say good-bye to their loved ones. Talking
to us was a way for them to say good-bye.''
Jo personified an inspiring, faith-centered humility. Whether it was
a parking space suddenly opening up on a crowded street; or the sun
breaking through a gloomy day; or one of her U.S.-Canada legislative
change programs working out just right, her instinctive response was:
``You see, God is good; glory be to God.''
She knew more members of the Canadian Parliament than most Canadians
and more members of the U.S. Congress than most Americans. Yet she
always thought that they needed a two-page letter of invitation to the
sessions and a full page thank-you letter afterward. She also
remembered to thank the least store clerk for a kindness and the lab
technician in the oncology unit for inserting the needle gently to draw
blood. As my Grandmother Oberstar said: ``She appreciates.''
Last Thursday, a remarkable event occurred in the hospital room after
a communion service with Father Bill George. Jo sat upright in bed,
oxygen mask full on, and proceeded to what I can only call a
commissioning. To son Ted: ``I want you to clean up the database on my
computer, clear out the unnecessary information, and these are the
codes . . .'' which she began reeling off rapid fire. ``Ted, you're not
writing this down; you won't remember it all.'' And then, ``Ted, I want
you to organize the liturgy for the Mass of Resurrection--and remember,
Ted, I want it to be a Mass of celebration; I want trumpet music.''
Then, turning to our eldest daughter: ``Noelle, there are a lot of
family photographs around the house that I have never been able to
organize and to display. Please, see that they are mounted and arranged
throughout the house to remember and celebrate our family. Be sure to
finish your education, or I'll come back to haunt you--and that goes
for Annie and Monica, as well.''
``Jim, I want you to go through all those boxes of my various
programs for the Centre. Send to Ottawa the program documents; throw
out the unnecessary papers, and burn my personal notes, those spiral
notebooks.''
To which I responded: ``Of course, I'll take care of all that, but I
think I'll just take all those papers into the Hill where we have a
good disposal system.''
``Did you hear me? I said, burn the personal note!''
``Yes, dear!''
[[Page H4784]]
Then, turning to nephew Tim Garlick: ``Tim, the most important things
in life are faith, family, friends, and love. Your family has given you
solid values; live by them, or I'll come back to haunt you, too.
Complete your education; get your degree; but remember, at the end of
life, when you're dying, degrees won't come and hold your hand.''
The Scripture teaches us--it was St. Paul--``These three remain:
faith, hope, and love; but the greatest of these is love,'' Jo had all
three of those qualities in abundance; and indeed, her greatest quality
was love.
Her test is now over. St. Paul also said: ``I have run the race; I
have fought the good fight.'' Jo taught us the purpose of life and
showed us the meaning and dignity of death. The test now is for us,
Ted, Noelle, Annie, Monica, the nieces and nephews, and all whom she
met and loved--to be better than our talents and good as her God-
inspired example.
____________________